Life's Negotiations

I love gifts. Too bad I'm not good at receiving them.

It's not that I don't like the present, card, compliment, or gesture. I actually freak out about how to respond to the generosity.

Partly it's because I don't feel I've done enough to deserve the thoughtfulness. That there are unspoken requirements that must be lived up to before a gift can be received.

I also assume with the giving comes an expected reciprocation. You buy me dinner, I pay for the movie tickets. Without the immediate parity, there is chaos. Selfishness. The dreaded IOU.

Not only does this way of thinking deny the receiver enjoying their gift, it denies the giver the joy of knowing it's been appreciated. No one wins.

The concept of receiving goes far beyond birthday presents and raves on a new outfit.

Before asking for what you want - recognition, acceptance, love - be ready to get it.

Remember that the clearer you are in your request, the more likely the answer will come. I want my family to respect my decision. I want that job. I want time to _____.

And then what? You freak out because you had no idea an opportunity would appear the very next day? Or, you say "Yeah. I knew that would happen. I'm so happy!"

A few tips:

1. Believe - You are worth it. No one else can convince you that this is true, except yourself. This is about removing self-imposed judgement and limitations.
2. Breathe - When a new opportunity presents itself, take a deep breath. Focus on this moment alone to really see it for what it is.
3. Receive - Take it in. Enjoy. This is for you.