Life's Negotiations

"Oh yes I'm fancy. So very fancy. From my top hat to my underpantsies."

You might recognize that from a Saturday Night Live skit with Jonah Hill. I quote that song often when I put out pretty kitchen towels or serve leftovers in delicate handmade pottery.

It's fun! It's Fancy!

I'm working with a close friend on a blog for teachers called Reflective Renewal. Our mission: finding meaning and inspiration through children's books. As a reading professor, she is the resident expert. I talk about how life lessons are applicable no matter our age.

Now, back to fancy (sheepish grin).

This same friend turned me onto the book: Fancy Nancy by Jane O'Connor.

For those of you not in the know, Fancy Nancy is a little girl who likes to be fancy. She prefers words like dressing gown over bathrobe, anything in French and wearing ostentatious attire. She no doubt owns a bedazzler. (For inquiring minds, I do not.)

I'm convinced that this book is about me. I love cocktail parties and seeing art films (subtitles!). I like going to a cafe for pain au chocolat, mostly so I can say the name.

I could go on, but you get the idea.

In the past, I cherished this personality trait, but just to myself. Through Nancy's eyes, I see how valuing fancy-ness shapes my perspective and affects my relationships.

I think many of us think we know our values and don't stop to consider what they are.

I, for one, didn't count fancy-ness among mine. It was an interest, not on par with my other values like health, happiness or self-discovery. In hindsight, maybe it is. By moving fancy to its rightful place, I get to accept myself more fully. And thus, others get to accept me more fully as well.

So basically this means I can more unabashedly cherish my fancy-ness, my joie de vivre if you will. And, I get to share that sheer delight with other people.

What could be a better gift to them and me? Being seen and allowing others to do the same.