Life's Negotiations

But I am. She's really nice.

The Ex-factor is a challenge to navigate in any relationship. Most people I spoke to have a strict policy on the subject. "I never speak to ex's" was the most common. Followed by: "we're amicable and that's it."

So how did I get myself into this? Well for one, I'm new in town having just moved to Washington, DC from Manhattan six months ago. I was looking for female friends who like things I do -- art, eating out, talking about life. The guy I'm dating knew just the person: his ex-girlfriend.

I spent most of 2009 lying to everyone, including myself.

From lies to "protect" my loved ones from what I believed they didn't want to know, to putting a positive spin on everything lest I be judged (while all along I was the one judging myself).

Trust me: it's lonely caught in a vortex of denial and avoidance.

'Tis the season for  miracles - both the everyday and spiritual variety. I think it's time to get in on the action, don't you?

"Inadvertent miracle" is a new term for a technique I've employed for some time. It is a cross between stumbling upon a miracle while walking down the street, like you would a heads-up penny, and making a wish on that penny before tossing it into a fountain.

The order of these two events is reversed, however.

I coach individuals and businesses on getting what you want and removing obstacles along the way. Because my background is in public relations, one of the topics we often cover is how to express yourself.

In your personal life, this can translate into asking for a promotion.

If you're in business, it is how you attract and keep customers. Your mission statement. Your website.

Sitting on the fence about a big decision? So was I.

I'm writing from my new space in Bethesda, MD. I just relocated my PR consulting and life coaching businesses from Manhattan, NY after a long journey this year of sitting on the fence.

What helped me to focus and decide unequivocally that this was the time and place to move, were two things.