Life's Negotiations

But I am. She's really nice.

The Ex-factor is a challenge to navigate in any relationship. Most people I spoke to have a strict policy on the subject. "I never speak to ex's" was the most common. Followed by: "we're amicable and that's it."

So how did I get myself into this? Well for one, I'm new in town having just moved to Washington, DC from Manhattan six months ago. I was looking for female friends who like things I do -- art, eating out, talking about life. The guy I'm dating knew just the person: his ex-girlfriend.

You are more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

I learned this first hand in 2004 after my third surgery to remove a benign brain tumor. Lying in the ICU with a small cylinder connected to my incision, I asked a question I never thought to ask before.

What is the purpose of this?

I spent most of 2009 lying to everyone, including myself.

From lies to "protect" my loved ones from what I believed they didn't want to know, to putting a positive spin on everything lest I be judged (while all along I was the one judging myself).

Trust me: it's lonely caught in a vortex of denial and avoidance.

'Tis the season for  miracles - both the everyday and spiritual variety. I think it's time to get in on the action, don't you?

"Inadvertent miracle" is a new term for a technique I've employed for some time. It is a cross between stumbling upon a miracle while walking down the street, like you would a heads-up penny, and making a wish on that penny before tossing it into a fountain.

The order of these two events is reversed, however.

With the holidays and the end of 2009 upon us, it's a great time to reflect and celebrate all that this year has meant to you.

Simply Leap has a lot to be thankful for, especially in the last month. In case you missed any of it, here's a recap of our appearances around the web:

• Planning a career change or to climb the corporate ladder in 2010? Find tips on choosing the right Career Coach or Mentor for your needs at the Women in Business blog, courtesy of Simply Leap's Lauree Ostrofsky.
• More career-related advice, this time to Keep Your Eyes on Your Own Paper. The classroom rule has been reinvented as a reminder to stay focused in this article on Examiner.com where Lauree is now the DC Career Coach.
• Feeling nostalgic? Responses poured in to: What Was Your Favorite Children's Book as a Kid? See the answers on the website for teachers, ReflectiveRenewal.com, and how their lessons relate to our values as adults.

 Thank you for reading and responding to Simply Leap this year! We hope you'll continue to provide ideas and inspiration.